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It’s A Conspiracy! How Marriage (According to the Bible) is the Wrong Choice For Women

in today’s “Bad Policy” and “White Jesus be Trippin” news….

I am hoping that this article will once and for all Prove that religious dogma is the greatest oppressor of women ever.  Hey, we don’t mind if you love the Lord…but do you have to willingly submit to the crazy rules written by MEN to silence women?

Most men in these days and times who have daughters would (we think) want them to be strong minded independent and happy – not miserable silent and frankly…as Yahweh would have it …just a piece of meat for a man’s pleasure.

Don’t believe us?  Well take a look for yourself and you be the judge.  The proof is both in written form an pictorial (for the slow people in the back).

And we swear, the next time a woman tries to Bible thump with us – We WILL hold her to the literal standards of the belief.  Deuteronomy & Leviticus ALONE should be read to all little girls as a bedtime horror story, more frightening than Freddie, Jason and the Candy Man all rolled into one.

What? I will be beheaded if I eat shrimp? (they will be ALOT of dead Black women at the Friday fish-fry – Don’t be sensitive – I’m Black, and I said it)

What? I can’t shave under my arms?

What? I have to kill my best friend because she is a Baptist and not a Jew?  But doesn’t that mean I have to kill myself if I’m Catholic? WTF?

You get the idea…You can’t just believe in something when it’s convenient.


Shouts out to the good people over at unreasonable faith for putting it into a compact list for your reading pleasure:

Polygynous Marriage

Probably the most common form of marriage in the bible, it is where a man has more than one wife.

Levirate Marriage

When a woman was widowed without a son, it became the responsibility of the brother-in-law or a close male relative to take her in and impregnate her. If the resulting child was a son, he would be considered the heir of her late husband. See Ruth, and the story of Onan (Gen. 38:6-10).

A man, a woman and her property — a female slave

The famous “handmaiden” sketch, as preformed by Abraham (Gen. 16:1-6) and Jacob (Gen. 30:4-5).

A man, one or more wives, and some concubines

The definition of a concubine varies from culture to culture, but they tended to be live-in mistresses. Concubines were tied to their “husband,” but had a lower status than a wife. Their children were not usually  heirs, so they were safe outlets for sex without risking the line of succession. To see how badly a concubine could be treated, see the famous story of the Levite and his concubine (Judges 19:1-30).

A male soldier and a female prisoner of war

Women could be taken as booty from a successful campaign and forced to become wives or concubines. Deuteronomy 21:11-14 describes the process.

A male rapist and his victim

Deuteronomy 22:28-29 describes how an unmarried woman who had been raped must marry her attacker.

A male and female slave

A female slave could be married to a male slave without consent, presumably to produce more slaves.

and of course …

Monogamous, heterosexual marriage

What you might think of as the standard form of marriage, provided you think of arranged marriages as the standard. Also remember that inter-faith or cross-ethnic marriage were forbidden for large chunks of biblical history.


  • only thing that bugs me, for real, as how so many christians (on their high horse) try to point the finger at other religions (namely islam) and say that christianity is the right, the better, the true religion because they have nothing to do with what they view as bad treatment toward women and yet in the very book they swear by, you get all this mess? im not even totally convinced that ALL of this mess is, indeed “mess” though that MIGHT be my libido and my have your cake and eat it to selfishness getting the better of my reasonable judgement, but turning a blind eye to your own religion’s creed while casitgating another religion for what you claim is literally “teh same thing” is something rather remarkable!

  • Sorry, I thinks its funny how some muslims say they are peaceful and yet rape christians, children, bury them alive, burn christians and anyone that dont believe their god, torture, brutally murder, marry children off, forceably covert people to their religion, bomb and blow people up leaving them without arms and legs, cut the heads off people who come to help the very people, their own people who they also do these things to and plot, scheme to cause mass murder worldwide, mistreat other people who are not their own and have no respect, expecting the world to embrace this islamic god. Expect respect and yet are hypocritcal, shockingly wicked proved by their own actions and does not do Islam any favours in believing their god to be the real god. If any government has caused them to want to fight, go to them because some of them have a massive problem. I as a British citizen did not harm your people or agreed to anyone of the wars, so why do you shed innocent blood. You insult our God in Christianity and expect us to respect your god who i dont believe. We dont force anyone to become a christian unlike Islam. The same way you tarnished chistians with the same brush is the same way you are now being tarnished. YOU REAP WHAT YOU SOW, no sin goes unpunished and anyone who does what I see this religion doing will answer to God. We leave vengence to God not take revenge into our own hands. You dont understand the bible so please dont try to explain it. You need to believe in Jesus, obey God so you can receive the Holy Spirit which helps you. You have no idea so stop insulting our Holy book, you are out of order and extremely offensive. May God help you to know Him, Father forgive them for they know not what they do.

    • That’s not true Christains did the same thing long ago. It’s not about religion it’s about the purity of your heart. We all no right from wrong. We are all praying & seeking the same God. Just like your name is said different in a different country because of the language. If do your research before you voice your opinion. God bless!!

  • But these are all under the old laws in the bible in the Old Testament. New laws are for living today’s life

  • Religion is nothing but crowd control in any language. Populations bow down to the written word of their God(s) and prophets only to be deluded into grandeur over other people because someone interpreted the rules, laws and bylaws in their own favor. Nobody is better than anyone else. No one religion is more righteous than the next. I do honestly believe their is absolutely one higher being and that is all. ~ msgottagetit

  • I think we can all agree that these are messed up things that happened. But if you take the time to read the Bible and look at these stories in their correct context (you cannot make accurate conclusions about the author of a letter by reading random lines in the middle of the letter) you can see that God doesn’t tell them to do these things. These things are in the bible to show us just how messed up PEOPLE are. God’s original plan was one woman one man, and that has not changed. and the roles of man and women are different but God makes it clear that they are equal.

  • All of these thing have been posted out of context. For instance in the beginning woman outnumbered me more then 10 to 1 back then God allowed for poligamy in order to “be fruitful and fill the earth” so they woman who we’re not married had two options they could become end entered servants (your so called slaves, except they weren’t slaves) or they could become a concubine and have children that way. The rule allowing a brother in-law to take in his dead brothers wife went along with this same theme it allowed his sister in-law to still bare children.

    The warrior takes a wife from enemies village, this was done for the same reason as above it was an option for the woman to still produce offspring, the bible clearly shows how the woman could stay marred to the warrior or leave was her choose.

    As for the so called excepted rape, the bible never said rape, it said to take the woman, same as anyone takes their wife. The money was because by taking the virgin woman and taking virginity from her out of wedlock you dishonered her family and must pay reparations.

    The bible talks about slaves who were being held by city/states who are not part of gods chosen.

    Arranged marriages back then was for a reason, that reason was in-breeding they arranged marriages to help prevent this.

    Also one must realize these are old testament laws for the beginning of the human race, when things had to be in order to probigate the human race.

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